Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Our Lil' Junior

Since I have had children, I am prone to uh...long pauses in the middle of sentences. Or stories. Or words. Sometimes those pauses turn into complete silence. Accompanied by a blank stare. Even if I am fully engaged in relating a story or news. I just plum forget what I'm saying.

I still remember the first time this happened to me. I was pregnant with Bo. There were so many things changing within me, and well, without me---I just was not entirely prepared for all of it. I was at dinner with my brand new husband. He was proud to be married to a smart, conversational girl. I was that. Once. I remember being mid-sentence, opening my mouth to finish it and nothing came. My mind was completely blank. I couldn't even remember what I was talking about. I barely remembered if I was even talking. I was so shocked by this. And a little embarrassed. There had been no interruption, no other pause, no reason to warrant this complete blanking of my mind.

I've come a long way since then. I totally embrace my complete lack of ability to finish some most sentences.

My husband is nothing if he is not understanding and compassionate, and willing to work with me in whatever handicaps I bring to this relationship. So, he has taken it upon himself to finish my sentences.

Almost all of them.

And if I wasn't trying so hard to hold on to every fleeting thought I have, I might actually be able to enjoy his "participation" a little more. Mostly it just frustrates me though, because he pretty much NEVER comes even REMOTELY close to filling in the "blanks" properly.

For example:
"Oh man, I saw a tandem bike today and there was..."
"A man in a tutu on the handle bars?"

Um, no. A father and young son riding it.

"Oh wow, did you read this article on global warming? It made me think I was..."

"Limber?"

Really?

I finally said something to him.

So now, while my mind is blanking, and my brain races frantically through the empty streets, and rows of houses with lights on and no one home, I get to see him scan his own brain with about 42 different endings to my sentence (none of which are even remotely close to what I might have said if my thought processes weren't so effectively hijacked). I'm not sure which is worse. Watching him have so much more going on in his head, and still not getting it right----or just dealing with his completely nonsensical endings to my thoughts.

What I really wasn't prepared for, was Bo to pick up the habit. Tonight we met J for dinner because he is working late. I was telling J how on the way there I almost missed the turn onto the freeway and kind of made a sharp turn. Bo said, "Whoa, that was awkward! Awwwwwwwwkward!" in response to the sharp turn. As J and I are laughing, Bo is quietly sitting in his chair, "Yeah, well it was awkward, so that's what I said."

I almost didn't hear him chiming in on the conversation. It was unnaturally quiet for him. But he was definitely engaged in our conversation.

A few minutes later J says, "I almost said something, but then I thought...." and he paused. Maybe to take a drink. Maybe to tell Avee to get out from under the table. I dunno. But then I hear Bo say, still quietly, "Man, I don't wanna deal with this!"

It was a great ending to the sentence. And totally something J would say. But it was not the direction J was taking at all.

I think it's good to see our own obnoxiousness in children. It's so much cuter coming from them. And a nice reminder of how uncute we are when we act like that.

23 comments:

Tori :) said...

First?

Tori :) said...

Awww yeah!! I am FIRST!!

J sounds like Tristan. Tristan always tries to finish my sentences and he's horrible at it. Sei's never listening enough to know what I said to begin with, so I usually just say "And I'm pregnant..." to get his attention again.

ucmama said...

I do this to James, but I finish his sentences with obnoxious things on purpose. And I had a good time, I should invite myself over more often!

Code Yellow Mom said...

HAHAHAHAHA! I can hear this happening! So funny. I love Bo's endings!

D does the same finishing of the sentences to me. And what makes it worse is that it completely derails me. There is no searching the RAM or ROM of my brain to remember what I was REALLY trying to say once he plugs his man in a tutu in. SOOO frustrating.

Bex said...

I just loved your analogy of running through empty streets! Girl you nailed it! I think of God's way of when you do finally finish your scentence or you have an idea you acctually can get out there you sound like a genuis.
PS Bo is H-I-L-A-R-I-O-U-S!! I love that kid and his random primary answers

Sketchy said...

You gotta love it when your dubiously wonderful traits are reflected in your children. Plus, there would be a small snarky part of me that would be really happy that J was getting his share of finishers.

Maybe that's just one of the many reasons he's better off with you.

Jenny P. said...

very funny... we have the opposite problem in our house. The first parts of conversations are left out... we just pick up most of the way through our thought, and then wonder why no one seems to know what we're talking about.

For example, I walk in to a room and say, "So I just asked her if she could come over anyway."

Huh. what? Who? so many unknowns and I want my husband to just figure it out. He does the same thing to me so we are mutually forgiving. And, the longer we are married, the better we are at actually making sense of our nonsense.

Bryner Family said...

As I was reading this, Miranda said she wanted me to do something (I wasn't paying attention because I am BLOGGING here!) and then she sad, "Dad gum it!" Perfect imitation of her Daddy. Yeah, much cuter and more horrifying coming from her. :) I think J is hilarious. Perfect match for you. :)

Sara said...

You are too funny!! Now I really wish I had known you and not just pretended I did :) You make me laugh so hard - most times because I can relate so well. I have to admit, I actually thought I was the only one with this problem. I was a little worried that I was becoming stupid... Thanks for relieving my anxieties! (I might be stupid, but I am not alone...Heh.)
And for the record, I think you totally deserve your award. If I were giving some out, I'd give you one too. If I had a bigger reader base, maybe I would start awards...Hmmmm...

omar said...

Tori cheated!

"Limber." I love it.

Millie said...

Bri does that to me and I always feel like slapping him when he does it. It is freaking hard enough to finish a thought without him interjecting his silliness in there. Doesn't he know, all my brain cells left with my breast milk?

Tori :) said...

Take THAT Omar!! Yesssssssssssss. I was just up golfing...

Heffalump said...

I have always secretly thought that babies and small children are brain sucking parasites (I mean that in a loving way).
Its the only way I can explain the continuing decline in brain function the more children I have.

Klin said...

I totally have Heff's idea of what happens to my brain cells.

I don't remember where I was going with a thought lots of times and feel like a dork. Soo crazy.

Maybe I'll ask Mr to start finishing my thoughts for me. He should know me by now.

Robert and Natalie said...

I am wondering if you could even write anything I didn't throughly enjoy reading if you tried. :) guess I just love you...what was I say???

Amanda said...

When I started reading this post, starting with the title, "Our Lil' Junior" and then your pregnancy/child induced brain lapses, I kept waiting for the announcement. I was sorely disappointed. Not by the post, but by the lack of their being an announcement of a new Lil' junior on the way. I'm over it though, no worries. ;)

the sheldons said...

You are hilarious. Someone needs to pay you to blog because that forgetful brain is too good to not be makin some dollahs on the side.

Big Jay said...

Amanda -

No--- We're far from there at this point.

Big J

NOBODY said...

Uhhh Big Jay?
There's something I've been meaning to tell you....

carrie said...

I give this post two enthusiastic thumps up. It is fine brain fart fun.

Kikibug said...

HAHAHAHAHA! Your kids are way too funny! "Yeah it was awkward that is why I said it". It is scary what our children pick up from us! I see so much of my behaviors in my kids and most of them I had no idea I did or said.
PS. I am jealous of your friend who gets to hear his funny answers in primary, that would be the best calling EVER!

Angela Fehr said...

We just saw Night at the Museum (we are totally not cool about seeing movies when they first come out!) and this reminds me of the curator guy - he never finished a sentence either. I am so guilty of this though - I think my mind is so busy that I am on to the next thought before I finish the first. People just gotta learn to read my mind!

Super Happy Girl said...

Just so you know what a good person/friend I am: I will not finish your sentences when we talk on the phone. I always think that waht you are a out to say it's so important and intelligent (thus making me important and intelligent) that you have to take a few second for your brain (and thus my brain) to process it all.

And thusly, I am ignoring this post alltogether.

So that's what I say.