Tuesday, October 7, 2008

I Think I Need To Go To My Happy Place

Okay, okay. I really tried to squelch this because I hate feeding into the idiocy that has become American Politics; People who treat other people like they are stupid and uninformed if they don't choose the "popular" candidate. Mainstream media spending more time on styles and "populism" than on the facts. Nearly every public figure at every turn doing the very thing I couldn't wait to grow up and be away from. The very behaviors I try so hard to keep my own children from doing, having.

When I was about 8 or 9 years old there were some rotten neighbor kids at the end of our street. There was an older boy, and a girl my age. And they were just mean. They said horrible, hateful things (many of which were things we'd never heard before) and basically hated us for existing. I'm not sure what triggered it, what inspired it, or what perpetuated it. But it was real and it was ridiculous.

So one lovely summer day, we were around the block from my house, climbing some trees and picking mulberries. And our friends showed up on the scene.

I don't remember the specifics, perhaps they wanted to pick mulberries and felt we were in the way, maybe they were just riding by---I really don't remember. However, I do remember my older sister, after having a go at yelling our own brand of hateful things, "Well at least I don't smell like a septic tank!" said, "Let's go." We started to leave, and the big dumb galoot boy (and I'm not exaggerating at all with big or dumb or galoot) hurled a rock at my sister. It nailed her face and she immediately started to bleed.

This was the sister who I could have punched into oblivion myself only 20 minutes before. I could have called her every name from every book I'd ever read. She infuriated me to no end most days.

But she was my sister.

And you don't mess with my sister.

I saw the blood on her face. We were horrified that they could be so awful. I was enraged. I wanted to tear down the street and beat the ever-living missouri snot out of their worthless hind ends. But I knew I was just one girl. Who couldn't really run all that well. Who got picked up by the scruff of her neck more than one time when she'd tried to beat up older siblings. So I did the next best thing and I screamed as long and as loud as I could,

"I HOPE YOU GO TO JAIL!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Even as the words left my mouth, I wished they hadn't. Give me a break Lil' Nobody, what 9 and 12 year old kids are going to go to jail for throwing a rock? Really? Is that the best you can do? I had wanted to say HELL but I knew, I couldn't be culpable for any crime. I had to be clean as a whistle when this case came before the judge and jury. I couldn't risk them saying, "Oh yeah, well Fatlip said 'hell'." No sir, I stayed safe with jail. Stupid, stupid jail.

I still remember the fury. I still remember my mind racing with the perfect payback. I wanted what I said, what I did to stay with them forever. I wanted them to suffer from the sorrow of what they had done. And my words would make that happen.

I still remember the absolute and complete impotence of my words. I remember feeling how pathetic they were the moment they left my mouth.

Why this story you ask?

These emotions are somewhat similar to how I feel right now about 2 things. The so called "bailout" which is really just a stupid, simple word for, "this is not a democracy, screw you middle class tax-payer, let's have another drink Wall Street Lobbyist!"

And politics.

There are a dozen things that could set me off, but here's the one of which I'm going to write.

I have heard the Republican party's views described as dangerous and small-minded. They are close-minded and oppressive. And one of those reasons, BIG reasons, is because of their view on gay marriage. Here's where you might think I'm going to express my opinion on gay marriage.

I'm not.

I'm going to point out that many, many, MANY people will use gay marriage as a reason they can't, won't, could never vote Republican. Maybe they will even pad it with other hot button topics "a woman's right to choose" or "change from the way things have been" or even, but I doubt it, "The Democrat's plan to turn around this disaster of an economy."

So to those people, here is what I want to know.

How come I've seen and read and heard in at least 12 places, reference to "Joe Six-Pack" (an admittedly ridiculous phrase) and/or reference to Palin winking but not ONE SINGLE SOLITARY REFERENCE to the fact that BIDEN and OBAMA DO NOT SUPPORT GAY MARRIAGE!?!?!?!?!!?

Joe Biden said it outright in the debate. The fact that I didn't hear it or read it referred to (in my limited exposure--but enough to hear all the Palin "flaws" dozens of times each) after the debate, tells me that one of two things is happening here:
1. Good ol' JB lied, and everyone knows it, and nobody cares.
2. It doesn't really matter what the candidates on this ticket say, or do, it's cool to vote Democrat and the simple facts aren't going to change that.

I wonder.

And to the fetchers who are getting tax payer money instead of having to deal with your own consequences like the rest of the world:

I HOPE YOU GO TO JAIL!!!!!!!!!

But not hell. Because nice mommy bloggers don't say stuff like that.

48 comments:

Carrot Jello said...

Wow.
I feel like I should say something really intelligent right now, when really, the only thing I was going to say in my comment was,
"Nobody, I really miss you. I wish you would put me on speed dial." But I'd feel stupid saying that, even though I was thinking it on my way home from work tonight.
*sigh*
I guess I'll just say,
God Bless America
or the pledge of allegiance to myself or something.

Carrot Jello said...

I'd like to add that I've chopped my daughter's bangs like that too. At that very age. I ended up sweeping them over to the side they looked so bad.

Carrot Jello said...

I'm just going to stay in here and softly sing to myself while I run my fingers along the wall.

Carrot Jello said...

you won't send me to jail for that, right?

iowamom said...

I'm, by my own will, not a very political person. But, it's nice to read that someone else has noticed these discrepancies like I have. And for some reason (maybe it's cuz it's 3 in the morning and I'm sleep deprived), I couldn't stop laughing about "I hope you go to jail!" Sounds like me. My head is always full of the perfect come backs, but they never translate when I open my mouth.

ucmama said...

I watched the debate last night and alternated between laughing out loud and/or being furious to swearing I'd vote Libertarian (which is where my heart is) to voting Republican just to cancel out some of my friends votes. Why are so many of my friends die-hard Democrats? Not you Nobody, you're cool. The reasons I'm thinking of going Reb. this go--round are these: Healthcare is not a right. I truly believe in my heart that people should help each other but NOT that the gubment should be the ones to do it. With a gun. A big gun. To back up whatever policies are made concerning a natl healthcare initiative. I don't like that McCain is somewhat wishy-washy on issues. But I REALLY don't feel Obama is very trustworthy. Uh, I think maybe I went over limit on this comment. I'll just be over in my own little corner of blogdom, k?

ucmama said...

BTW, I'd like to invite myself over to your house to watch the next debate. I'll bring something yummy :)

Big Jay said...

Joe Biden can get away with saying he doesn't support gay marriage because there isn't any doubt in anyone's mind who wants to legalize gay marriage that when the time comes, he'll be fully supportive of it.

But in a debate Biden didn't want to lose any votes on that issue. He did the same thing with Nuculr power. I doubt Obama Biden really support nuculr, but they've taken some hits lately on it and... whatever.

I agree totally. Someone needs to go to jail.

ucmama said...

I'll go to jail! I'd get to workout and read and not have to cook and only have to share my room with one other person and watch cable and get free internet and...oh...I wouldn't get to play with my kids and spend time with James though. Ok, send Obama then.

Heffalump said...

I feel like I've missed out because somehow your blog feed isn't working anymore! So I didn't know you had posted the last two times. I'm all about the feeds you know!
Politics drive me crazy too. I'm glad I don't have to see the stuff on TV since we don't get good reception here so we don't watch. Still, wanting to be on top of things and all, we bring it on ourselves by keeping track via the net and etc.
I have a sinking feeling the vote is not going to go my way, and its very upsetting to me.

The Howertons said...

I hate to even admit it, but last night was the first "presidential thing" I've watched not including the spoofs on SNL.
Its hard to take anyone seriously. It makes me feel like I'm in jr high again and making up stuff that I would do if I was elected class president. (needless to say I didn't get it.)
Retarded! and that's a word we don't say in my house.

I haven chosen to not choose sides cuz I just don't like my choices. I was taught as a child if you don't like what we are having for dinner - then don't eat it!

so, since I disagree with a lot of things that are being said and don't believe the rest of it- its hard for me to take anyone seriously.

I vote for Tina Fey.

What?

isn't that a choice?

Sketchy said...

The thing that annoys me the most about politics is how they will always say whatever it is they think will make them win. They have no personal integrity. And then they say trust me!!!

I don't. I hope they all go to jail.

And I HATE the bailout plan they put through. Seriously, it's the biggest financial challenge of our time? And so we had to throw 300 billion dollars worth of pork into it? You couldn't just vote for or against it because you thought it was right or wrong? UGHHHHH!!!!

Code Yellow Mom said...

My bloglines doesn't tell me you have a new post. I found this by accident. I want bloglines ot go to jail.

I personally think it's interesting that so many women who have power suited their way to the top trying to "empower women" have such a problem with Sarah Palin's brand of woman. I thought we were all in this together. But apparently not. The only women who are supposed to run for a big office in America are the ones who play dirty with the men. Hmm.

And I'm really, really, really mad about the bailout. Can't even see straight about it, really. And you should hear D froth about it. It's awesome. :)

I like your big galoot boy story. So true. Sometimes words don't go far enough for the nonsense in this world.

Tori :) said...

Ok, I'm gonna have to re-read your post. I got lost.

Tori :) said...

Ok- So... yeah. I'm not voting democrat because I guess I am "close minded" and "dangerous." I'm wild like that. :P

The way I see it- Obama has always sounded like he's full of crap to me. There- I said it. I think he talks a good talk, (as long as his teleprompter is working) and that's about it. And now I'm thinkin' Joe Biden is too- although I was impressed with him in the debate for the most part.

Honestly, I can not vote Democrat because the party goes against everything that is REALLY important to me. I also feel that by supporting a party that supports things I know are wrong- well, I will go to hell. ;)

I got a funny email about Palin walking on water and the media reported it as "PALIN CAN'T SWIM." LOL.

Tori :) said...

"Well at least I don't smell like a septic tank!" is awesome!

Oportos said...

Amen Sista! I'm not into politics myself, but I have been captivated by this election. Ufortunately, I can't stand either candidate I'm just trying to figure out who the lesser of two evils are.

Good thing you didn't tell that kid to go to hell, cause I did and got a big toy truck thrown at me and ended up like your sister. (but it still felt good...shhhh)!
Terra

omar said...

I'm glad Heffalump said something, I thought it was just me. Your site feed isn't working anymore! I didn't know about your last few posts.

I wrote a really long comment about this post, but I decided to delete it. If I want to be that wordy, I should do it on my own blog.

Go directly to jail, do not pass go.

omar said...

I've had a change of heart. :)

Though gay marriage is a hot topic these days, I don't think marriage is the issue. I think that gay rights are the issue. While Obama has said that he believes marriage to be between a man and a woman, he has said that he supports a state's right to recognize gay marriages, and he also supports civil unions which would allow gay couples to have legal rights similar to (though not identical to) hetero married couples. He doesn't think that who someone loves should preclude them from adopting a baby, getting health benefits, or joining the military. So yes, on the surface, all of the candidates have indicated that they don't support gay marriage. But the candidates do NOT share the same views on whether or not it is OK for the government to discriminate based on who someone has the hots for.

I don't think it's unexpected that it's 'cool' to vote democratic now, considering that we currently have such an unpopular republican president. Plus, the P. Diddy and Leonardo DiCaprio are Democrats. I'd follow Leo anywhere!

This was like, half as wordy as my original wordy comment.

Sara said...

I like your post - and your story. I have to say, though, that the mudslinging goes both ways. If I were to align myself with a party, I'd probably lean more towards the democrats and I have certainly heard more than once that that sort of opinion will send me to hell. Not jail, though, so maybe jail is the worse word after all? ;)
Can't we all just get along or is that too juvenile? Is it sad to be wishing for a political world where everyone was honest and did what they promised? Where people looked out for one another? Mech! Hey, how about Nobody for President!!! ;)

Tori :) said...

Omar-
Leonardo DiCaprio? Really?? He always struck me a wimpy. I was probably the one chick watching 'Titanic' saying "Rose probably outweighs him!! Get someone manlier!!"

Now, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, Alice Cooper, Bruce Willis are cool. But not Democrats. ;D

omar said...

Tortor Sauce:

Pre 2000 Leo was wimpy. Post 2000 Leo is tough. Gangs of New York? The Departed? Even in Catch Me If You Can, a movie with no blood, he was awesome.

(As far as nicknames go, Tortor Sauce isn't as good as Torisaurus Rex. But I didn't want to overuse it.)

Tori :) said...

Nah. I'm all about "The Rock." Did you know his middle name is "Seiuli"??? It means "Chief" in Samoan so he probably received it more as an honorary name.

Leo just does nothing for me. Kinda like Tom Cruise. Even in 'Top Gun' I liked Slider much more than Maverick. I always think "I could slide a quarter sideways up Tom's nostril..."

Tortor Sauce! Oh Omnar 3000- you make me LOL!

Tori :) said...

Hey Nobo- I gave you an award. So... go get it off my blog and pass it along. Please pass it along because I only gave it to 2 people. :)

aubrey said...

i am of the opinion that voting for me will be between the lesser of two evils. i am currently leaning towards obama, how can anyone STAND sarah palin? she's such an embarassment to women. don't throw rocks yet, {no pun intended} i still have not made my decision.

as for the bailout, it makes me sick. and i think they all should go to jail. i think if i had just seen richard fuld testifying, i would have punched him in the face too.

aubrey said...

side comment: leo? really, omar. i'm disappointed in you. even if you're talking about post 2000 leo, he still is scrawny and has a high voice. ew.

Tori :) said...

OBAMA is the "lesser of 2 evils"??? :(

Nobody said...

I think we can find some common ground here, Obama and McCain supporters alike.

Dwayne Johnson is a god. He is perfection personified. Aside from the name. The Rock was a good substitute.

I'm fairly certain Omar isn't interested in Leo based on physical attributes. But I think he is a brilliant actor. Seriously. He can't help it if someone made him say, "Rose, ROSE!" over and over. It was his script! If you want some good examples of what a great actor he is watch: What's Eating Gilbert Grape, Catch Me If You Can, and The Aviator. He makes every character he play, believable. I think that is a sign of true talent. Not like Julia Roberts who purses her lips the exact same in every movie. "You broke my heart" (purse lips) "I am a smart hooker" (purse lips) etc, etc, etc.

UCMAMA, you are invited. And it better be good. :)

Iowamom-I'm glad you laughed at I hope you go to jail. It still makes me laugh. The best comebacks always come much MUCH later.

And really Tori, Bruce Willis? Uh hey, 1989 called...

Carrot---4? Really? It's like winning the lottery.

Tori :) said...

I'm pretty sure the rules state that if Omar is gonna follow Leo, who is wimpy, I can follow Bruce Willis who has been in cool movies and is cool hangin' with his ex's husband. I will double-check though...

(BTW- I LOVED "What's Eating Gilbert Grape?" Leo was awesome.)

MommyJ said...

see how politics insights the comments?! It really is a hot button topic. And you're completely right. It's sickening and annoying and so fueled by the media... I hate it all. I am totally disenchanted and hardly want to vote at all. But I will. Because I must.

excellent point about gay marriage.. if it doesn't suit the purposes of the media though, it will never be mentioned.

Charlotte said...

I am going to be pinching my nose when I vote this year. I really wanted a non-socialist choice, but oh well. Even though he is my choice, if I hear McCain say "my friends" one more time my head might explode.

Tori :) said...

LOL at Charlotte's comment! While watching the debate I told my son, "Why does he keep saying that??? It's driving me crazy!!"

Big Jay said...

I've already sent in my absentee ballot for McCain. But basically I plan to actively campaign against all incumbents who voted for the bailout, even if their challenging opponent is a bag of rice.

And just for the record... it will absolutely blow me away. Completely blow my mind... if Obama loses.

Andrew said...

Nobody, you're straying into my territory. Good for you.

I have always found it deeply ironic that the "Party of Open-Mindedness" condemns any opinion that doesn't fit their world view.

See what you think of this quotation: "The German and American New Deals may have been merely whatever Hitler and FDR felt they could get away with. But therein lies a common principle: the state should be allowed to get away with anything, so long as it is for "good reasons." This is the common principle among fascism, Nazism, Progressivism, and what we today call liberalism. It represents the triumph of Pragmatism in politics in that it recognizes no dogmatic boundaries to the scope of government power. The leader and his anointed cadres are decision makers above and beyond political or democratic imperatives. They invoke with divine reverence "science" and the laws of economics the way temple priests once read the entrails of goats, but because they have blinded themselves to their own leaps of faith, they cannot see that morals and values cannot be derived from science. Morals and values are determined by the priests, whether they wear black robes or white lab smocks."

-- Jonah Goldberg, "Liberal Fascism" p. 131

Not that the Republicans are better. They left me behind when they tossed fiscal restraint to the wind in order to buy votes--a policy that is coming back now to deeply harm our economy.

The unfortunate truth of this election is that both major candidates are steering the U.S. toward the same socialist polices that have ill-served Europe and Canada (not to mention the former U.S.S.R.). One's just intent on stepping harder on the gas than the other.

Big Jay said...

Andrew. Just last night I was talking to nobody and said that I wanted to read that book. She replied - "Sounds like a downer. Are you sure you want bog yourself down in something like that?" Well maybe I do. How is it?

Andrew said...

I've only gotten the highlights so far--my brother has a copy which I intend to borrow. He found it excellent.

I think it's a must read in coming weeks for those who wish to see clearly what an Obama administration will be doing.

As a Progressive in the early 20th Century meaning of the word, Obama espouses the frightening philosophy described by Jonah Goldberg, as did Woodrow Wilson.

If I can't borrow it soon, I'll be buying my own copy.

Charlotte said...

That book is already on my too read list. It's my next nonfiction on my list (right after I finish The Forgotten Man).

Barnecked Lady said...

SOOOOOOO........ speaking of GAY. Have you seen those new little ad vert is ments about not using the word GAY, to describe something as stupid or dumb. I have one thing to say. They are soooooooooo GAY!

oh and is there some sort of election something or other going on? lol

Methodical wormer said...

Politics are like nails on a chalkboard to me.

At this point I want to pick the worse candidate so the second coming will be sooner. It's all going to go to crap anyways, why not speed it up? Just kidding... mostly. Heaven help us.

Jamie said...

amen sistah.

Jamie said...

Because in order to be a "true Humanitarian" you just have to be democrat. Because Hollywood is, too.
They've also defined what "tolerance" means too. Like if people break up Ellen and Portias' wedding - it's because of HATE. Not standing up for what they believe or anything ridiculous like that...

Just sayin'...

Because there are people that say "who am I to tell people who they can and cant love". Is that what this is about? As if it wouldn't totally change the world their children live in...

Just really sayin'...

So my point is, Tina Fey needs to go to Jail. She's on the hot tamale train.

Physcokity said...

"...it's cool to vote Democrat..."

...lies...Did I ever tell you I loathe "cool" with a burning passion? ;)

It's kind of a catch phrase that my friend and I share, but that whole "cool" thing that people try to be, live, portray etc is lame. Just acknowledge you're a freak and move on!

PS when I say "you're a freak" I include everyone. I don't hate, I'm an equal opportunity discriminator. ;)

Physcokity said...

Omar, you forgot "Do not collect $200".. I'm just sayin'

Physcokity said...

Tori :)... You have good taste. I heart Alice Cooper, and thoroughly enjoy listening to his radio show here in the sandbox. It Rox

I'm not crazy Mommy said...

Sing it, sister. I hate it all, and I'm thinking of starting my own political party that requires a test to join. You pass.

portuguesa nova said...

And again with my theory. The NICEST people on earth!

Considering this is the most powerful nation in the entire world, I think we can do much much much better on both sides.

No Cool Story said...

I told you I was going to read all your posts.


HMMMPF.

No Cool Story said...

I've already voted. I sent in my ballot Saturday :) YAY.

My Super Awesome Twin pretty much said everything I wanted to say in her first comment. So there.

I remember last election, the whole "Vote Or Die" FAIL campaign.
Ah, good times.