Poop, Strep, Pho, Felons

Yuh know, three more days of vacation after Christmas wasn't all it was cracked up to be. Granted, there was lots of laying around and sleeping in---on my part, and that's not typically feasible on regular days. BUT. Changing 5000 diapers, giving Danyo 3-4 baths a day, changing sheets twice a day, and the smell, oh the SMELL...that's not my idea of a great time.

Today Avee has strep throat. Turns out she's more like her dad than me. She says things like, "I'm hot" and she has a blazing temperature of 103.2. She says, "My froat kinda hurts" and it's totally swollen and covered in white spots. She says, "I feel sleepy" and falls asleep on the couch several times and then sleeps in until 11 am.

If I had any of those symptoms, they'd be hearing about it in Kiev.

I started to spend the better part of my day in an urgent care waiting room. I would become one of those people, like, from my job. I was filled with all kinds of cognitive dissonance sitting in that waiting room even though I knew I needed to be there. There was a 2 and a half hour wait and I had to work in 3 hours. And my poor little pookie-poo wanted to be held. While I stood up. By the doors. With my itchy coat off. She isn't a complainer, but she comes demanding in every color.

While waiting, and catering to sick Avee, wishing there was some other way, I suddenly remembered that we have a "connection" and I could avoid that blasted waiting room. I called J and he worked that connection while I took Avee home to change out of her jeans and shirt, back into her princess sundress.

Bo had wanted to go hang out with us at the doctor's office, but I didn't let him come. So, when I had to leave again to get the antibiotic, he was in that car in no time. It was glorious. Within an hour of leaving the waiting room where I thought I was doomed to be all afternoon, I was home with antibiotics, bananas, avocados, Zelda, three bowls of Pho, and a partridge in a pear tree.

Avee had asked for french fries and chicken nuggets and I was going to indulge her. But then I realized it was a perfect day for Pho. But I am the nicest mom in the universe and I let Avee choose. She picked Pho.

Bo has been a little frustrated with Guitar Hero because, well, because he stinks. And because his hands are too small. He's a pretty good sport, but it's just not the best gift for him. So we decided to get him Zelda, a game he knows and loves. I was going to pick it up while getting Avee's antibiotics, and surprise Bo. So now that he was going with me, I had fun building up the suspense for where we were going. The game store is right next to Walmerts, so I was going to get Avee's Rx at Walgreens, swing by Walmerts and get avocados for J's killer guac, and then go to the game store. But on the way to Walgreens I passed my favorite little grocery store and said to Bo, "I'm going to go in here and get avocados instead of going to Walmerts."

He asked why. I answered, "Because that Walmerts is disgusting and if I can avoid it, I will."

I believe I offended him. He said, "That's mean mom. Don't say that about Walmerts!" I was amused by his response. And I said, "Well, it is!" because I always have the best comebacks evoh.

So, Bo forgave me, or at least moved on and we started talking about America being the...wait, about how much "Amewica wocks". Yeah, I'm his mom and it took me a good 15 seconds to figure out what "wocks" means.

We have the coolest flag, and we have Barack Obama. China is cool, but the flag is boring. And Vietnam totally wocks. Actually, China wocks too. You know why Vietnam wocks? That's where Pho is made. And his bunkbed.

The game store was in a strip mall with a Payless, Sally's, Subway, and a hair cutting place. I told Bo what all of those stores were, to make him guess. He was resigned to a sandwich being his "surprise" when I took him into the game store.

And since we were right there I couldn't help but go into Walmerts and check their avocado selection. At my favorite store they were not quite ripe enough. So we dashed inside. They were the same, not ripe enough. But I bought some anyway because they were only 78 cents each.

As we were leaving, Bo acknowledged loudly, as we passed by a whole slew of Walmert shoppers, (without making any connection) "Yeah, you're right mom, this sto' is disgusting, it smells pwetty bad."

Did I laugh out loud? Oh yes I did. Did my face flush red? Oh yes it did. Was I technically embarrassed? Probably. But mostly happy because he said, "You're right mom."

Bo asked to be dropped off at home while I got the Pho. That Zelda game was burning a hole in his wii wee little hands. I told him no. Then at the Pho Store Bo asked the man if he was from Vietnam. He said he was.

Was he born there?
Yes he was.

"THEN YOU CAN'T EVOH WUN FO' PWESIDENT LIKE BWAHK OBAMA!!!"

Fortunately English was not this man's first language, and unimpeded English is not my son's first language and this loud accusation was lost on our kind Pho maker.

On the way home we talked about "loudly pointing out the obvious" and "saying things that don't need to be said if they aren't going to make someone feel good" and also how it's good that the reason he can't run is only because he was born in Vietnam and not because he had committed a felony.

Of course, we don't actually know that for certain.