I Have No Title

So, I'm feeling all sorts of new pressure to be interesting and clever. I feel no such pressure in real life. Ever. I'm perfectly content to be the person other's say, "What was that?" when they walk away from me. But for some reason, since I've started airing my laundry on the internet, I'm all nervous about what people think.

It might be because Anchored Nomad linked to me recently and referred to me as funny, and that's a lot of pressure because she is probably the funniest blogger I've ever read. I mean, she can have me laughing about something she writes for days (it's not just the stories, it's her delivery) and that's a talent. So, people who are used to her effortless hilarity, come here and I'm sure it's like biting into a potato you think is an apple.

And then last night, I went to a glorified Tupperware party and after the sales spiel, a girl leaned over and said, "We haven't met, I'm _____. I read your blog." How's that for pressure? Hi ______. She was nice and said nice things, but really, my palms are all sweaty now!

It has ever been my goal to keep it real here. And it's hard when there are contests and awards and who knew comments would be like blog-crack for some and there's pressure in some places not to be a mommy blogger, etc. Believe me, I'd rather be a supermodel blogger, but these are the cards I was dealt.

Of course I feel proud of posts where I can elicit thoughts or stories from others. Or ones where I can make someone laugh out loud. But the single most gratifying result from this blog, is the journaling of my children. I love looking back and reading the things they have said and done that would otherwise be forgotten or just become a blur in the past. I LOVE that I have chronicled, Bo's adorable little speech impediment. It was less than a year ago he was saying "Fpidoman" and now there's hardly a trace of that. However, last night, I realized he says words that end in double L's really funny. When he's at a stage where he's such a know-it-all, I love hearing him say all expertly, "It's not a bahw, it's a roh".

Yeah buddy, like that makes any sense.

I started this blog for family. I've made some great friends through it, and that has been a definite bonus. People who's paths wouldn't ordinarily cross mine, have become people who matter a lot to me.

And now to steal a line from my subtle friend NCS,

SEGWAY

Lately my kids seem intent on being attached to my hip. And while there is plenty of room for all three of them, it's still a little annoying. And oft times, weird. Like when I go to the bathroom and they try to follow me with their breakfasts in hand. For Bo it's a story he absolutely needs to get out in the next 30 seconds or his head will blow up. For Avee, it's like she can't exist without being by my side. She sits on the floor in the bathroom when I shower. She lies in bed with me when I nurse Danyo first thing in the morning. She squeezes in between my back and the computer chair when I'm at the computer. I am that awesome. She can't get enough of me. You know you wish you could squeeze into the computer chair behind me.

I often tell myself, "This won't last, they'll be teenagers who think I'm stupid before I know it, live this and love it." And I do that pretty well, most of the time. But I think there might need to be some changes. Soon.

Last night I went to bed at midnight. 1 hour later Bo was next to me. It felt like he was interlaced through my ribs. I don't know how he does that, but he always has. Danyo woke up at 2 and wanted to eat. I made J take Bo back to bed and got Danyo. 3 am Avee was on top of me. On top of me. She isn't satisfied with in my bed, or snuggled against me, she, like always, takes it to the next level. I have no idea how long she was there, I was so tired. But at some point I took her back to bed. She was back again. I took her back to bed. Danyo woke up to eat, and there was Avee again. I left her alone. After an hour, I got her back to sleep, Danyo back to sleep and 15 minutes later there was Bo, grabbing my face with both hands to plant a kiss squarely on my mouth. Someone needs to tell him about morning breath fatalities. I'm sure there are some and he's careless. I groggily told him to go play on the computer and I slept with my two appendages for another 45 minutes. And where is J in all this? Obliviously asleep. He has it so good.

I have decided that if my winning personality in the daylight hours makes me so popular with these kids, that they can't stand to be away with me in night hours, I probably need to make some administrative changes. I just don't know what yet.

So, I told Bo to take off his pajamas and I intended to run upstairs and grab him some clothes. Only, he must have heard me say, "Take off your clothes and then run up the stairs in your underwear wailing at me for leaving the room while you are telling me about your favorite Ben 10 episode". Upstairs though, I got this pearl of wisdom from my genius 4-year-old.

"You know why they call these boxers?" he asks as he sweeps his hands around the top and sides of his spidey undies. "They are called boxes because they are shaped like a box" and he shows me again the square shape of his body.

Oh no sweetie, that's called genetics. And you are welcome.