Monday, November 17, 2008

As If You Don't Already Know Too Much

A while ago Sketchy, my personal comment mentor and humorist, tagged me for a 7 things about me kind of thing. I don't think it was too long before that I had done 200ish things about me, and well, even I'm not that narcissistic. Even though I do love myself and this is my blog. :)

So, now I'm going to do it. I've been thinking long and hard for something new to share.

1. I am not a neat freak, by any stretch of the imagination. But there are certain things that I absolutely have to have in order and organized. Paperwork/bills, where the kids toys go (when they aren't strewn across the house), and the kids drawers, to name a few. Even J's drawers, actually. In fact, the only dresser drawers in this house that don't have any semblance of order, are mine. Hmmm...

2. I am prone to exaggeration like most people when I say things like, "Ohhhh, I was up all night with the baby." I may very well have been up 3-4 hours, but that's not technically "all" night. Or I can say, "Oh my gosh, you've asked me that like 52 times already!" and it will really have only been 3-4. However---and here's the random thing: When people say it to me, I totally believe it, without any regard that they may be exaggerating, just as I do. For example, at work the other day I went to a girl's desk and said, "The doctor for room 8 is ________" and she said, "Oh my gosh! You are the SIXTH person to tell me that!" And I walked away, trying to think of who the 5 people before me were that told her. I was seriously trying to recall why anyone besides me and the actual nurse assigned to the room would know or care to tell her. But I didn't once consider she might be exaggerating.

3. I value sincerity pretty much more than any other attribute in a person. I would rather a person ignore me, give me the bird, tell me they think I'm pond scum, then ever ever ever be insincere with me. I can spot it a mile away and I loathe it. As a result, I cannot force myself to be insincere, I have tried and if I'm speaking, the words literally get caught in my throat and won't come out. So, if you are ever talking to me and I suddenly go silent, it's because I think you are being insincere and I can't talk. Or I'm choking on my tongue. And in that case, please help me.

4. There are some people's voices that sort of lull me into daydreaming. I don't know if I can describe it, but there are a few people I've met or know, who when they start talking, I'm almost immediately distracted. It's not a lack of interest in them, or even what they are talking about, but I swear it's their voice. In general, most conversations are a competition with the ones I have going in my head, and there are just some people who can't be heard over my head. Yeah, I think I made that clear.

I'm sorry, what were you saying?

5. I am a sucker for a sad story, but that doesn't mean I believe it. Sometimes people will start to tell me a sob story and I will feel very sorry and then I'll get the distinct impression that I'm not getting the truth or the whole story, and I'll continue to feel very sorry. But I won't believe it. I'll mostly feel sorry that the person feels they have to lie.

6. I love name meanings. I did not pick Avee's name. I liked it okay, but really didn't want to name my child "Avee". J was dead set on it and since I didn't hate the name, I couldn't rightfully veto it. But everywhere I looked, her name meaning was "ruler of elves" and I just couldn't willfully give my beautiful daughter such a lame meaning. When she was 4 weeks old, I found a little framed art piece that said her name meant "Noble" and read "she succeeds in establishing her considerable importance---her priceless smile rewards her attentive subjects---her pursuit of excellence will court favor in high places---she will maintain stately presence and poise".

I hoped that this would be fitting. I had no idea that they had tapped into my 4 week old baby's brain and written an EXACT description of her. I could probably link to about 50 posts that are evidence of each of these statements. One summer, when she was a teeny tiny 15 month old, she tried to push my 14 year old niece off the pew at church. She just decided she didn't want another pretty girl there, and went to work pushing her off. We laughed about tiny little Avee being such a bossy thing and then Erica leaned over and said, "I guess that's what Ruler of the Elves means---she's a tiny little Elf who thinks she rules everyone". Suddenly, I liked BOTH name meanings.

7. I'm kind of lazy.

22 comments:

InkMom said...

First?

InkMom said...

Yes!

I have tried like 17 times to be the first one to comment. (Believe me?)

Charlotte said...

I googled "ruler of elves" to see what names came up. Did you really name your baby girl Beowulf? I mean, I guess that is cool (did your sincerity detector just go off?).

MommyJ said...

Nobody, you have such funny, witty commenters...

all I have to say is that the dresser drawers in my house are exactly like yours. Even down to the my drawers being the only messy ones.. actually, I think we are crazy in all the same ways... you'd never believe how much time I've wasted looking for missing pieces of toys cause I can't stand missing pieces. And bill paying... always, always on top of that.

I absolutely don't talk to myself though.

Sweet little beowulf. Can't believe Charlotte blew your cover.

S said...

Beowulf Hmmmm? Very interesting. Red just ate all the smarties as fast as she could so I couldn't have any. Avee wouldn't stand for that why do I have to?

Howertons in Iowa said...

Wow! even out of all of your posts (at least that I've read) even your 200th - I like this random things about you bestest. In all sincerity, really.

1. not a freak? was that just a Halloween costume? you weren't the crazy red head chasing her kids down the isle 1400 times yesterday?
2.I had no idea you were exaggerating. you should add this to your resume - excellent exaggerator.
3.I'm giving you the bird, sincerely.
4.I got nothing - cause that just resolutes the freak. yeah, that's pretty clear....
5. my husband almost died from cancer Twice - does that make you sad. Whole story. Promise.
6. Chan was almost named Avee, that would have been awkward.
7. I love that you are lazy - it makes me look good.

Thanks for making my day! As Always!

Suzanne said...

"4. There are some people's voices that sort of lull me into daydreaming." Yes! This is me exactly! And it always happens with speakers giving talks in Sacrament meeting! LOL! :D

And yes on 7 too! I admit it. I am a couch potato.

Rebecca said...

love learning just a bit more about ya.. and avee is the perfect fit.. ha ha.. little elf ruling.. love it!!

InkMom said...

Okay, now I'm feeling guilty for my other comments . . . sincerity here: It's always nice to know there is someone out there just as slightly-off-kilter-enough-that-other-people-might-notice as I am. Idiosyncrats, unite!

(Sounds like the perfect name for the one political party that can finally include everyone.)

omar said...

How about if I insincerely gave you the bird?

No Cool Story said...

Re #2:
That's called "stretching the truth."

Sketchy said...

You're awesome and I kiss the ground you walk upon...OK obviously not really because A. I don't live anywhere near the ground you walk upon and I'm not traveling that far, today anyway. And B. because that would be gross and I ate my share of dirt when I was 2 and don't care to relive it. And C. I don't want your sincerity-dar to start going off and be unable to talk to me again if we should ever actually meet. But you're still awesome.

Really? Me? Comment mentor??? I need to add that to my descriptions...

Sadly, I would think it was cool to name my daughter "ruler of the elves" - it's true, I'm a dork. You weren't under false impressions before were you?

No Cool Story said...

#3: "So, if you are ever talking to me and I suddenly go silent, it's because I think you are being insincere and I can't talk."

WHAT!?!?!?!?!
:(

No Cool Story said...

"I'll mostly feel sorry that the person feels they have to lie."

I find all this very intimidating.
Thanks Sketchy! Look at what you did to me.


*I know this is not about me, but I love to make it mine!

No Cool Story said...

I still feel sick.

Tori :) said...

Wow- you're good at this. I mean, ALL seven things were way interesting. And I am being totally sincere.
And my name: Anna Victoria means "Graceful victory." I WIN!

Evil Kitty said...

Evil Kitty has a sad story for you. Norman Bates Momma forgot to feed Evil Kitty for a long time and now Evil Kitty is emaciated and wilder than ever. Evil Kitty will accept your sympathy now.

NOBODY said...

Inkmom:Congratulations on being first! I totally believe you tried 17 times.

Charlotte:You are hilarious. My cover is blown, and all this while I've been passing her off with a sweet nickname like Avee. "Sincerity detector" cracked me up.

Mommyj:Hi. How's it going? I do have funny commenters. I thought I was safe admitting I have conversations in my head because I know at least one other person who reads my blog does...can't believe you'd leave me hanging out there all alone like that.

S: I can just picture her eating them as fast as she can. That's funny. Sorry you didn't get any smarties.

Howerton: Did I actually say 1400? Because the proof is RIGHT there if I did. Did you believe me? A couple in our ward named their boy Avee exactly one month before ours was born. I was all worried about it and J said, "Believe me, it will be tougher for him to have a "girl's name" than it will be for our daughter to have a boy's name. So, good thing you went with Chan. :)

Suzanne: Thanks for standing by me. :)

Rebecca: Was there really anything you didn't already know?

Inkmom2: Awww, don't ever feel guilty on my blog. Totally not allowed around here. And I agree, it's always nice to know that you aren't alone in your weirdness. I mean idiosyncrasies. THat's a nicer word. Even if it does start with "idio".

Omar: Honestly? It would make me laugh. Sometimes I forget people aren't joking when they do it in real life (mostly on the freeway) and it still makes me laugh.

NCS: You say tomato...

Sketchy: I forgot to mention that exaggerated sincerity that is complimentary to me is TOTALLY acceptable. Encouraged even. And yes, you always make me laugh or say something insightful in your comments. Now just TRY to rest on your laurels...

NCS 3.0: Okay, when have I EVER gone silent talking to you? Seriously now. And you are good at making it about you. It would help more if you were actually prone to making up stories. And sorry I didn't warn you before the vomit story. I already lost two pregnant readers---but it's really not my fault I have disgusting kids.

Tori: You are funny! My name means "Angelic" so I think that can translate to "I LET YOU WIN".

Evil Kitty:I've missed you, evil little feline. Come over here and let me scratch your bony little head...

Bonnie said...

8.) You are hilarious !!

I laughed my way through this entire post !!!

Sarah Tilley said...

i've got you way beat on exaggeration and laziness, hands down. if i'm going to overstate something numerically it's not going to be in the double digits, nope, we're talking millions, at least five of them. sometimes billions. and don't get me started on laziness and henry's nice neat drawers and my wadded sock/underwear drawer. and once you bust me out of my shy-shell, i'm revoltingly sincere.

aubrey said...

oh dear, nobody. i am so against insincere people. i don't even want to be near them. and i have such a hard time being insincere that i just don't say anything at all. so, if i can't be completely honest with someone, i just have to not say anything at all.

Super L said...

It's not called exaggerating. It's called "Livi-ing The Story." At least at our house it is. And I don't even know why, because I totally NEVER exaggerate. I have never even exaggerated once, in my entire life, ever.