Nobody + Gifts = ♥

I have decided that holidays like Valentine's Day, Mother's Day, and special occasions like, my birthday and our anniversary, are like 6th grade science projects for my husband. I'm wondering if this is universal.

I am a big believer in birthdays. I've loved mine since...well, since I was born. I married someone who kind of views the day as every other day. He's not a hypocrite, he feels the same about his birthday. If you tell him happy birthday, that's nice. If you don't...well, let's just say he doesn't lock himself in the bedroom and cry himself to sleep.

He hasn't had the best luck with me on various "special" occasions. The single biggest reason for that is, to him they aren't all that special. To me, I believe there should be writing in the sky. Just. For. Me.

So, after some painful (for him) heart to hearts, and long (for him) nights, and some mean, mean (for me) words, I have to say, with no hesitation, the year of 2008 has thus far been successful for my husband.

After arranging for a lovely (and definitely overpriced, but I'm not looking a gift horse in the mouth---well, at least not his molars, it's hard to not notice the big front teeth though...) Valentine's gift to be delivered, he waited anxiously for the "reaction". Much like an 11 year old pouring the solution over the subject of an experiment, he watched with wide eyes, wondering if it really did work like he'd been told it would. His hypothesis (which was given to him by me) finally matched the experiment results. He's learned the hard way that the hypothesis "If I pretend the holiday/special occasion doesn't exist, it will go away quietly" does NOT match his test results. There were some serious explosions, near fatal injuries, and possibly even temporary hearing loss as a result of testing THAT hypothesis.

I heard him say after a successful Valentine's Day, "Wow, that really was easy. I could do this without any help from anyone. A nice basket, some good smelling stuff, mingled with some chocolate, and VOILA!"

Sad. But true.

In a side note, and in my defense, I have told him that he can have a buy for Valentine's Day. It's not that big of a deal to me. I really mean it when I say it. He really doesn't believe me. I suspect it's not a risk he's willing to take.

I did marry a smart man.

Mother's Day has been nothing shy of disastrous for us. Without going into too many details (and because my mother reads this blog), let's just say that this year, was a year of proving one's self. And of making one's self a way out of the dog house, back onto our nice, king-size, often invaded by sideways sleeping children, tempurpedic bed.

He did great. He took the kids to pick out cards and they were darling. Bo's dictation on the card was as adorable and hilarious as the boy himself. Avee's card was perfectly apropos, even though she picked it for the birds on the front. J wrote "Dear Mom, I love you. Please continue to do nice things and give me hugs and kisses like always." Even though Avee didn't dictate that, if she could have, she would have. With an emphasis on the "please continue to do nice things" part.

He accidentally got me something that I had expressed interest in a few months prior. I was so touched that he remembered. He didn't, he just got lucky, but it didn't matter after the fact.

So, nearly a week later, I'm puttering around the house pretending to clean and I'm reflecting on the lovely Mother's Day I enjoyed. And I start to recall J on that day. As I sat opening the cards, he sat across from me, watching....waiting....wondering. I saw the look of, "Well, I'll be, THAT was the right solution to pour over the subject" as my face brightened and my smile remained through out the day. I saw him walk away scratching his head, shaking it, undoubtedly thinking, "Now who would have thought that was all it took?"

I know we are a mystery. Yesterday I watched a movie where a man asked a woman, "What do you want!? What is it that woman want!?" The woman leaned in and said, "We don't know either."

Sometimes I feel like that's true. Especially after I said to my husband this week, after coming home 2 hours later than he said he would, "It would have just been better if you'd never called to tell me when you were coming home!" Now, that made perfect sense to me. I expected him at 7 when he said he'd be home. He came home at 9. I was mad. I feel sorry for the guy when I get like that. Of course, he could just come home at 6 and there would be no problem whatsoever, right?

I married a great guy. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't know how great he is, and there isn't a day that goes by that I am not grateful to be married to such a good person.

Mostly I'm glad he believes in the scientific process, and works it.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have an anniversary coming up in a few weeks; there are many unrealistic and unexpressed expectations I need to get to work on....