Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Because I Haven't Done Random In A While

Yesterday I was rushing out the door to get my kids to vacation bible experience (yeah, it is "experience"---whatever happened to good ol' fashioned "school"?) and to meet my friend at the Y for her first time at boot camp. In my rush, I took only one step onto the 3 fairly tall steps outside my back door. That step, I turned my ankle and flew down the rest. I was holding Danyo. Big girls like me should not be falling like that. I turned my body as much as I could on the flight down so that Danyo would be protected. As clumsy as I may be, I'm still a considerate mother.

Avee started wailing, "nooooooo mommy, NOOOO GET UP GET UP!"

Danyo was at first silent, I think the whole thing just shocked him. Then he started crying. And recently he has taken up screaming. That's like the one thing in a child I can't handle. And I got lucky. He doesn't just scream when he's mad. He walks around the house just letting out random gleeful screams.

So, there I am, laying on the ground, two kids screaming, Bo saying, "Whoa! How'd you do that!?" He always thinks accidents are some amazing feat that are planned and choreographed.

I started saying, "I'm okay, I'm okay" to calm Avee and to convince myself. Danyo was completely okay.

One of my neighbors saw the whole thing.

Honestly, traumatized kids, bruised body, wounded pride---being seen falling like that was the worst.

I told him that I was okay, but to pick up Danyo and make sure he was.

Everyone was fine but I wasn't feeling too motivated to get up off my back.

When it quickly became more unacceptable than the moment before to still be lying on my back, I slowly got up.

I took my kids to VBE and limped all the way through the building finding their rooms.

I even thought I could still manage boot camp, but by the time I got there, it was half over and my ankle was throbbing.

As per usual, my ankle is my least painful injury. My shoulder is killing me, I have a bruise the size and shape of Texas on my derry-rear and my whole right leg is just kind of stiff and unfriendly.

When we got in the car, Bo said,"That was so funny, wasn't it mom?"

Again, with the inappropriate responses.

Then last night, I said crabbily to J, "I don't know! I haven't felt like talking to anyone today, I'm just not in the mood to deal with anyone." And he, without thinking, but trying to be understanding said, "Well, it's okay, you kind of got off on the wrong..." then he paused, thinking twice about using that particular phrase---even though he was thinking by then that he was pretty clever. I laughed. Even though it wasn't funny. At all.

And that is all I have to say about that.

In other news, Bo appears to have lost his hearing and I don't think I can take another incident of REPEATING MYSELF. I hate repetition in the first place. And nobody told me that repetition was first and foremost on the duty list of parenting.

Today while running a few long overdue errands with baby D, I heard a song on the radio. The chorus made me laugh out loud. I've decided that whoever coined the word "badonkadonk" is a literary genius. From the Subway commercials to Tracy Morgan to this new non-objectifying-of-women-what-so-ever, country song, it always makes me laugh. Put honkey tonk in front of it, and it's even better.

Avee told me yesterday that I "crack her up". Well, it was more, "Oh man mom, you cwack me up!" I thought it was adorable. I love how these squishy little bald things that lay around turn into little mini redheads with cute laughs and funny phrases.

Danyo loves to walk backwards. I have never had a backwards walker like this. I think he likes the challenge of it. Which is a personality trait that Avee also has. They got it from a great, great, great, great grandparent who was a pioneer. I can't think of anyone in either of our immediate families who willingly seeks out danger and precarious situations often resulting in bodily harm, like Avee, and now Daniel.

So, I've noted the backward walking and thought it just the cutest thing ever. Because I am a very typical mom and kind find cute and genius in just about anything my child does. Well now, he has started crawling backwards. Dude, is it backward or backwards? I dunno.

He does it in an exaggerate slow way and combines it with an expression like he's backing away from something very dangerous. Usually it's me. He's not entirely wrong. I just wonder how little 1 year old kids come up with the stuff they come up with. I know some things are imitation, but I'm pretty sure he came up with this all by himself. See? Genius!

Okay, I'm boring even myself now.

Edited to add:
After picking up the kids from VBE, I took them to get lunch. Avee's chocolate milk got thrown away. I forced Bo to give Avee a sip of his. It spilled, all over the sidewalk. They both started bawling and I laughed out loud as I stood here in the hot sun, with two screaming kids, late for my next appointment, while they cried over spilled milk.


Barnecked Lady said...

WOW! You have pioneer ancestors that walked backwards. COOL!!! j.k. I feel your pain of falling down stairs with a child in your arms only mine happened in front of an entire congregation while I was pregnant, 2 secs before church started. Totally embarassing and painful and a little funny now that I look back on it. Great post, it made me lol on a not very lol day. Thanks!

Code Yellow Mom said...

Oh! The Milk! That's almost as awesome as the "ruined" granola bars, eh?

Charlie screams, too. Happy screams. A lot and loud. We were at people's house on Sunday and I've apparently gotten used to the noise because the hostess (a soon-to-be empty nester whose kids I KNOW were hellions when they were little) said all frustrated-like, "Does he do that a lot?" I smiled and said, "Yep."

Soooooo sorry about your ankle/shoulder/derry-rear/pride. Falling as a grown-up is the WORST.:) You're awesome for saving Danyo, though. Hope you get all non-limping again soon.

Code Yellow Mom said...

Oh, and the walking backward thing...hilarious. I want a video. :) It is truly funny that he does it like someone told him, "Put your hands down and step away from the trash can" or "Never turn and run from a bear - always back away slowly." How, indeed, do 1-yos know this stuff?

S said...

I forgot about that fall, my bad. My bottom hurts just thinking it. I used to love VBS! Remember when our picture was on the front page of the paper at the Baptist VBS. OOPS! I can't wait to see Danyo walking backwards. LOL

EarthBint said...

I really really dislike retptition too, SOOOOOO annoying. Katherine is beating me up...

Funny post as usual. 27 days :-D We get in on your birthday!!

No Cool Story said...

The milk also made me think of the broken granola bar :D

I'm sorry you got hurt. AT leats nothing is broken.
I love it that Bo enjoyed it so much! ;)

Sarah Tilley said...

i think if it was a one time thing you'd say backward, but since he does it habitually it should be backwards.
sorry about your badonkadonk bruise. my mom fell down the porch steps once and got a huge bruise on her butt. it was so spectacular my sister took a picture (gross, i know) and drew crayon depictions of it in church to annoy mom. yeah, my sister was nineteen or twenty at the time.
henry used to scream when his slice of processed cheese ripped in the process of extracting it from the wrapper. or if his graham crack broke in half. now he screams when he's happy, something he picked up from his girlfriend.

aubrey said...

i think repeating myself is truly my #1 pet peeve. that and speaking up so i can be heard. if i say something once or twice to my kids and they STILL say what? i ask, "did you really not hear me?" and then ava looks at me and i can tell if she really didn't hear me or if she is saying it to torture me. it's usually just torture. and i feel the same way about my kids being geniuses. and beautiful. and amazing.

aubrey said...

i loved this randomness.