Tuesday, April 13, 2010

I'm Tired of Thinking of Titles

I have lots of thoughts running through my head during the day, potential blog posts. I haven't had that in ages. Is this the re-emergence of Nobody blogging? Maaaayyyyyybeeeee.

I wish I could say they were meaningful and well-formed thoughts. Mostly they are me figuring out why I'm so dumb about some things, or just laughing at what my kids say. So yeah, ain't gonna win no prizes for meaningful here.

I imagined the other day that we settled here in Iowa and effectively became Iowans. And then I became annoyed with all the people who made fun of Iowa. Like I do. It would be fitting for the life lessons I tend to learn. I'm going to start making fun of people who vacation in Cancun all the time. For good measure.

Yesterday I had throw-downs with both of my kids. It made me realize what really good children we have. I think they are a tad bit on the spoiled side, and that's my doing---but in general, they are really good, responsible, responsive, decently-mannered kids.

Bo has a retaliatory temper toward Avee and when I made him and two friends go back outside and stop bugging Avee on the Wii, he turned off the game on his way out. He got in big trouble for that and spent nearly half an hour upstairs wailing and writhing on the floor. I wish I was joking about the writhing part. I don't think it's ever NOT made me laugh, how he gets Fainting Goat Syndrome when he hears something he doesn't like, and he's tired.

While we were enjoying that special mother/son time upstairs, I finished changing the sheets in the boys' rooms and moved into Avee's room for some straightening up. I discovered a pile of clothes smashed behind a toy box, covered a little by a feather mattress I had stored in her closet. She's gotten lectured about this probably 4 or 5 times in the past. I've made it easy for her to put away everything except shirts and dresses, which she is supposed to put on the end of her bed for me or J to hang up. In this pile were about 3 skirts, 5 tops, 2 pairs of tights, 1 dress, and a couple of pairs of pants. I was really, really annoyed because a few of the things were things I had specifically missed and spent time looking for. Some other things were past the season to wear, so basically she "wasted" some perfectly good skirts. :)

I called her in from outside and within 2 seconds of me pointing to the pile on her bed, she was crying and whimpering. I told her she had to sit in her room for 20 minutes, in hopes that she would remember this unpleasantness next time she went to stash what she should put away. She cried almost the entire time. But two things kept making me laugh. She would forget she was sad and start talking to me. I would forget she was in time out, and respond. So we had about 8 conversations like this.

"Why are you putting Bo's shirt in Danyo's closet? That's Bo's"
"It used to be Bo's but it fits Danyo now."
"Why doesn't it fit Bo anymore?"
"You are in a time-out, you are not supposed to be talking to me right now."
"YOU'RE TALKING TO ME!!!!"

She was right, every time. And oh-so wrong.

She also claimed several times how she didn't like me anymore. I've always wondered what the exact right response to that should be. I say so many different things, "Yes you do, it's okay, I still like you, you don't mean that...." etc.

After her time out was over and she came to me for a big hug, I sat down with her and we talked about her saying things she doesn't mean when she's mad.

I started with, "You love me, don't you?" She nodded. I said, "remember how a few minutes ago when you were mad and you said you didn't love me? You don't really mean that and I want you to think about what you are saying when you are mad. It's not okay for you to think of every mean thing you can to try and make me sad, just because you are mad."

"I never said I didn't love you. I said I don't like you. And when I said it, I meaned it. I don't like you when you are mean to me. But I like you now."

Excuse me? How do you get off being more logical and articulate than me little lady!??

It was a huge realization for me. She doesn't really know how to say, "I don't like what you are doing right now and I'm really very mad!" So she says, "I don't like you." I always hear, "I've never liked you and I don't care how mad I am, you aren't worthy of my love anymore!"

I love having this new knowledge.

My friend told me last week she took Avee, Avee's friend, and her son to McDonald's. At the drive thru she asked, "Do you guys like fries?" They all said yes. When she got them home, not a one of them ate their fries. So she said, "I thought you guys said you wanted fries, why aren't you eating them?"
Avee said, "You asked if we liked fries, not if we wanted them. We said we like them."

I wonder how Avee manages dealing with us sloooooooow adults.

I lopped off all of little D's hair. He has the reddest hair of the three and it's terribly cute to me. I took him out somewhere yesterday and it was floppy and goofy looking, so I decided it was time. It was painful watching big chunks of his darling hair fall to the ground, but I know he's got hair like me so it will be back in full floppy form in no time. As the dust settled and the last buzz was made, Bo exclaimed, "He looks just like me!" Bo hears it all the time how much they look alike, but now with matching haircuts, it's undeniable.

Later when J got home from running a quick errand, Bo pointed him out and said, "Tell me that boy doesn't look just like me!" So many things about that statement crack me up. It is very very Smith, and since he seems so much like J, I love to see a little Smith peeking through like that.

Danyo says I can "finish dat mom" and then I need to go light a sparkler for him. So I better get back to my real job.

The end.

8 comments:

Sarachid said...

FIRST

Sarachid said...

I started cutting a little bit of Brother's hair but felt sad so I stopped.. it's beautiful

Avee is to smart!

Rebecca said...

making fun of people who vacation in cancun.. for good measure.. bwaa haa!!! Love your kiddos.. and love the logic..uh, that she uses on you!!! She is your kid!!

Sarah Tilley said...

Fainting Goat Syndrome. love it.

Charlotte said...

If Iowa doesn't work out there's always West Virginia...

I always find the favorite outfits I've forgotten about behind furniture, or stuffed some other place, after the season is over or they've out grown it. It makes me crazy!!

If I have one more person turn off the wii or log off the computer in the middle of their siblings game, they'll be writhing, but not voluntarily.

My kids are expert semantics-ers. I don't know where they get it from (not from their mother who never lies, and so has become an expert double talker).

So, yeah, we're practically raising the same kids.

PS, I might (might!) be driving through Iowa this summer...

Klin said...

I have NEVER made fun of Iowans. I cannot say the same thing about Nebraskans. That state just gets to me. Besides there are a couple of families that live in Iowa that I love AND I don't know any good Iowan jokes.

Avee is very smart. I think she could take me and I work with teens that think they are smart.

Super Happy Girl said...

I read that "Farting Goat Syndrome"
And "I'm tired of thinking of Titti3s"

Sorry for making your post R rated.

Super Happy Girl said...

Avee is so clever :) she's got your number sister.