Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Excuse Me, What Happened to July?

Is it really already July 15th? Yikes!

I'm in Utah chilling at my friends and having a splendid time. My kids are going to bed at hours that are borderline abuse. And then climbing in bed with me in the middle of the night, mere moments after I fall asleep. Which is total abuse. I need a little more room than their sprawling, snuggling bodies allow.

We drove through Colorado and spent a day there to break up our trip. We went to the Butterfly Pavilion which was awesome for all of us. I'm with my three kids and two sixteen year old girls. And then you know, I'm 29. We all loved it. Bo got to hold a tarantula for a 12th of a second. Which spiraled him into a world of spiders and only spiders and the biggest spider and the fastest and the smahtest and ugliest and the one that would beat Caleb's if they were racing and....500 miles across I-80 worth of spider talk. It was awesome.

I don't mean to brag, but my kids are amazing travelers. Avee barely makes a peep, well, toward me. She pretty much talks nonstop to her "friends" in the backseat with her. Bo is delightful with only the occasional meltdown when things like a speck of his slime from the Butterfly Pavilion falls to the ground and I won't let him get it. Or I speed. He's all, "Is the speed limit 83 Mom, because that's how fast you are going and I don't see any signs that say '83'!" Okay J.

We stopped in Evanston, Wyoming for a quick bite and we were served by Napoleon Dynamite's very close relative. He was staring down at the cash register when I went to order, so I thought perhaps he was trying to work something out, so I was giving him time, watching him. He never looked up and after a few minutes of me not ordering, he said, "Well!?" In a very Napoleonesque way. Then when I had the nerve to ask what came on the burger, he turned and did a Vanna White on the teeny part of the board that showed what comes on a burger. The best part was, my niece asked the same question like three minutes later. He did the same thing, with a little more annoyance. But the thing is, he wasn't like, in a bad mood or a rude dude---he was chatty in a very odd way. And basically the only thing that makes it all make sense, is that he's related to Napoleon. We are sure of it.

Being around other people who haven't seen me or my children for a while, makes me acutely aware of how my children behave. Avee is a 4 year old, pg version of a sailor. She talks about inappropriate and crude things almost nonstop. I don't know why, and I'm having a hard time modifying it.

Avee:My booty, my booty, my booty! Hahahahaha!
Me: Avee, come on, you don't need to be talking like that.
Avee: My booty!
Me: That's enough Avee, no more.
Avee: I'm just going to say 'my booty' one mo' time.
Me: hmph.
Avee: My booty! See, I just said 'my booty' one more time!
Me: Stop!
Avee: (turning slowly and "slyly") Yoooooo booty?

Danyo's been a little freaked out by all the traveling and hoteling and wondering at which point he's going to get ditched. We've stayed two nights at my friend's so he's finally comfortable. He's also suddenly said like 8 new words so I'm thinking Utah is stimulating his left temporal lobe. Mmm hmmmm.

We had Cafe Rio my first night here. It was delish, but I'm thinking my friend in Iowa has mastered the art of duplication because it doesn't turn me into the normal cracksalad-seeking crazed lunatic that it has in the past. This makes me happy because I can't take Cafe Rio with me wherever I go, but I can take Kim.

Today I get to meet a friend from my mission, after which, I will be getting ice cream from the ice cream shop on steroids, with my niece, to celebrate completion of a dentist visit. That's how we roll. And later, I get to meet up with Yvonne for more ice cream. Pretty much going to be the awesomest day ever.

My blog posts are too long.
The end.


Heffalump said...

Sounds like fun! Butterflies, spiders and ice cream Oh MY!

Mikelene said...

Only you can make traveling with 5 kids (including 2 teens) sound like a blast. The Napoleon relative? Too funny.Highway patrolman Bo? :) Sailor Avee? Double :)

Yvonne said...

I would love to go to the Butterfly Pavillion. I would love it (except for the taratula ; )

Can't wait to see you tonight.

Analiese said...

Tell us who you met up with!!! I m jealous :(

Howertons in Iowa said...

29!! HA!
That is soooo funny!

Oh and the other stuff you wrote- that's pretty funny too! :)

Iowa misses you already.

Mrs. Organic said...

The speed limit police - they live in my car too.

MommyJ said...

Oh yes. Jordan polices my driving all the time.

"MOM! Don't you think you are driving a little fast for a road with this many curves? It isn't safe!"

I miss you. I hope you are having fun. I wanted to call you today. But then remembered you were in Utah doing important stuff. Like talking about bootys.

I love Avee. And I don't even know her.

sarah said...

i'm so sad I missed you, maybe I will take a road trip to see you oneday?

mycurlyhairdays said...

Love it! I am so glad you are having so much fun! And cutie Avee, why can I see that whole conversation???? She is so funny!
Ok, where did you meet the Napoleonite? I want to stop and visit him!!!
And where is the ice cream shop on steroids!? I want to go there next time I'm in town!!!
Miss you!
Have fun and be safe!!!

Code Yellow Mom said...

There's a butterfly pavilion in Colorado? What about a traveling Titanic exhibit? THAT would be the best.

You shoulda got a picture of Napolean's relative. Although I think they might be the majority of the population of Wyoming...:)

I ate some Ben and Jerry's the other night and was thinking of you, out there somewhere in the world, trying to skip July.

Thanks for posting. And be happy that Aves is the PG version of sailor. Booty is nothin' compared to what gets thrown around 'round here. And the more we say it's not OK, the more it continues. I just don't know where the *#&)$^@*&^# they get it from!

Clint & Alicia McLaws said...

I'm very grateful to you for NOT posting pictures of the *gulp* spider. *shudders* I've got HORRIBLE arachnaphobia...and even seeing the word...tarantula....*dry heaves* I dry heave. Real, fake...alive, person, on tv, in pictures....I cannot stand them. Oh ick. I feel like my skin is crawling now.

At any rate, sounds like your vacation is fabulous. I'm jealous :)

Sir Nottaguy-Imadad said...

Maybe your "Dynamite" server would have rather been hunting wolverines at his uncle's ranch instead of working.
Loved the line about I don't see any signs that say 83.
Ice cream parlor on steroids, sounds good to me. As a teenage, I could eat more ice cream that one thought was imaginable.

Tori :) said...

YAY! You're alive!! You know, I had to chat with J the other nite bc he logged in as you. :(

megachick said...

any day where you get ice cream twice is an awesome day. are you visiting the y in utah?

Klin said...

You're in UTAH and I haven't seen you?! What's up with that?!

Heffalump said...


Klin said...

You have a happy birthday and I'll take Danyo anytime. He is A to the dorable!

The kitty likes him- the big f. a. t. one (that word offends him so we spell it) that doesn't like anyone but hubs likes Danyo. That makes him a pretty special kiddo. :)

Loved hugging you and seeing you. Travel safe.

Suzanne said...

Happy Birthday, Nobody! (I'm a little late...) But Happy Birthday, anyway! :)

Lisa said...

Happy Birthday!

Kim said...

you can take me with you to the ends of the earth...i will always make you some CRack {Cafe Rio} this post but missed you while you were gone. Someday we need to visit Utah would be a grand trip.